Once told a boss “with all due respect, and I do mean all the respect you’re actually due in this moment, I won’t be doing that”

Most of the dudes I’ve let inside me have been clowns

This is the only correct form. Until this very moment I have almost always fallen on the descriptivist side of things, but this is now the prescriptivist hill I will die on.

I’m imagining it like some sort of vaudeville slapstick skit, wherein the doctor just keeps pulling things out, starting like dice and a neckerchief, and ending with an entire clown car full of clowns

My first instinct was to hate you for this.

Then I realized I could send it to so many people, and I became the monster I feared most.

I’m 34. I don’t think I need to schedule one yet, I’m not particularly high risk family history-wise. But I’m worried about scheduling it when the time comes.

That doctor gonna know I’m a bottom, and that’s gonna be embarrassing.

Had to Google that. In my day we would have called it the Masturbatorium

Neither a programmer nor from California. I’m a rare southern red

That sounds fun!

As cold as the other people in the house will let me. I have rarely lived anywhere with functioning central heat and air (and have never liked it when I did), so generally I use window units and a cunningly devised system of curtains. I don’t care if a hallway or the bathroom gets hot, so long as the bedroom and kitchen stay cool, y’know?

In the winter I almost never use heating, except for a small space heater I just take room to room with me, and one that I run while in the shower.

It’s the same thing in that both cutting sugar from your diet and living inside a 90°F/32°C box both take all possibility of joy out of your life

If you can afford them (they can be shockingly expensive here in the states!), actual wooden shutters are very attractive and work quite well at cooling a home.

But, if you’d like to keep your view and stay cool, awnings are another option. They keep the window in shade and prevent heat from entering the home nearly as well as just blocking the window, while allowing the window to, y’know, keep on windowing.

If you’re somewhere without a ton of regulation or nosy neighbors, awnings can be made super easily with just some poles and tarps, or even a sheet of plywood depending on how much you care about appearance.

Same boat. I’m not vegan, and I’ll probably never be. I could genuinely see myself going lacto ovo, but honestly, that wouldn’t be so hard for me if I only cook for myself. But, like, it is clearly the correct moral decision, and anyone arguing that is either misinformed or lying to themselves

Yeah, that’s the level when you keep telling people “I’m really thinking about going vegan. I’m pretty sure I’m gonna do it”

I’ve never played, what do I need to know?

My answer would be something along the lines of: I think astrology is vague enough to apply pretty generally, but the interesting thing about it is seeing people’s reactions. It’s a social placebo, and we can see how different people read into the same thing. “A new experience awaits you, Aries” and we see one person anticipating a raise a work, and thus behaving more confidently and getting it, while another is expecting divorce papers, and their behavior is helping them to reach that goal, too.

Yes, but I haven’t watched a ton.

Those two are my favorites of what I’ve seen (outside of Ghibli, which I feel like is a category unto itself).

I haven’t seen the last season of Attack on Titan, so don’t spoil it, but I feel like Eren is complicated enough that I’m not going to form a full opinion until I see how it plays out. Light, however, I think is an irredeemable sociopath that justified his murderlust by going after socially convenient targets until he decided it didn’t matter anymore, and began to think of himself as a god.

Fucking excellent storytelling, but I didn’t care for the L replacement kid

Glit walked slowly across the plain, eyeing the group of hunters that surrounded the creature. It was large, much too large for the tribe to eat before the meat spoiled.

As he approached he could hear the argument already.

“No, rapal, you take that part! It was your spear that slowed her enough for us to catch her!”

“But it was your arrow that finally brought her down, Jatam, you should have that part for your family! You have 5 younglings!”

They would carry on like this for hours if left to their own devices, none wanting to be seen as greedy.

Glit approached and broke into the conversation,

“Hunters, good hunting,” he said loudly, “Karana has smiled upon you today! The beast has laid down it’s life for the survival of our people!”

The hunters beamed, proud not only of their work, but now in the secure knowledge of it’s righteousness. The hunt has been approved, sanctified by the Storyteller, the one who speaks for the gods. They know they will be rewarded.

The hunters began disemboweling the enormous creature and cutting the choicest sections of meat off of her as Glit began to tell the story of Olana, the great Mother Elephant. He has told this story many times, but the hunters never tire of hearing it. When the work is done, and the story is told, Glit will reward the hunters and walk back to the tribe with them.

Well that’s going on the list

Beat me to it. Mine was “storytelling and sexually gratifying the hunters in exchange for food”