All better! Global democracy is now unfucked, yay!

/s

Stop it!

Okay, now do it some more…

Oh wow! 60 whole days of fees that no one will pay?? My cup runeth over

They were demonstrating how they are human scum

Republicans are really good at this thing called “collusion”

I don’t care how they’re picked, you generally shouldn’t feed peppers and spices that you’d use in chili. And never onions, garlic, or grapes regardless of the intended application.

These rules come from the same people who put a slice of cheese on apple pie. “It adds a savory quality to all the sweetness.” Fuck off, it adds the taste of cheese to apple pie. People also like mint and chocolate, maybe you should eat some M&Ms coated in Vicks vaporub

Chili is steaming dog food with too many spices and onions for dogs to eat. If you think your chili tastes better with beans or even cinnamon, then get down with your bad self. Anyone who tells you otherwise is welcome to not eat your chili.

“Syrup doesn’t belong on waffles/french toast”
“Cookies shouldn’t have raisins”
“You shouldn’t put butter on your tortillas”
Fuck all y’all, I’mma eat my food how it tastes good and you can maybe chime in once you got a show on the food network

^I’m a Texan who will eat your chili with or without beans and I approve this message^

“Oh my God, what on Earth is that??? I accidentally dropped a dollar that I took from you! Better burn it before it accidentally helps somebody…”

What do you think the chances are that they kill social security’s payout mechanism without dismantling the process of collecting it and then treat their thievery like pennies from heaven?

I read a lot of Goosebumps and Stephen King when I was a kid. You don’t see me trying to start a government by gluing masks on people and feeding blood to cars. Some people appear capable of reading things without acting upon it and punishing their constituents.

“Temporarily closed”

I’m sorry, friend. You didn’t deserve to be called that…

Do it. I fucking dare you. It’ll be fun to watch a media powerhouse and a douche meth lab burn each other down.

Demon wranglers

All of my dogs have loved our current vet. I’ve tried a couple other vets that were closer to me at different times, and my current vet is the only one that our dogs have been excited to visit in the 20 years since we met her.

In toasty we trust

You might wanna narrow your scope on that wish or else you’re gonna get some early homosapien fetish/murder info.

I get what you’re saying, but the point of raising the pay is to push out the middling underperformers or motivate them to change. These are the same people who believe that lottery tickets are essentially investments because you gotta spend money to make money.

When you raise your wages across the board, you expand your hiring pool and begin attracting people who have the aptitude to be a teacher and the aspiration to get paid a decent wage. Once that starts happening and you get better performing employees, the ones who want to keep their jobs need to step up if they have been underperforming. If they don’t, you replace them, plain and simple.

I didn’t say she was smart or right. In fact, that’s kinda the point. These are the types of candidates flooding interviews sometimes.

No, because if it paid more, the sector wouldn’t be as flooded with middling underperformers. No joke, I knew a young lady around 10 years ago who studied education because “it’s an easy degree and they help shove you through because the bar is so low. No one wants to be paid so little to do so much. But if you can make it through your first two years, it’s almost impossible to fire you for anything that isn’t related to sex or violence.”

Her first week as an actual teacher in her own classroom with her own students, she kept posting her daily lesson notes from her whiteboard on Facebook. It only lasted a week because she got tired of everyone correcting her spelling and dates. She was a history teacher…

ETA: Don’t get me wrong, I 100% support public education to the point that I’ve dedicated the past decade of my life to working in public education even though I find kids incredibly overwhelming. That being said, I can support something and still point out that it’s broken.

I’d give you gold, but all I’ve got is lead and a particle accelerator. Good luck!